


Team Fortress Three

by Latent



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2016-04-22
Packaged: 2018-05-30 08:12:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 8,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6415825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Latent/pseuds/Latent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Red and Blu, once vicious enemies, are now giving up the fight and returning to their homes. Mann Co no longer sends them new weaponry, and instead focuses on their wealthier clients. Ms. Pauling ditched her name and disappeared. The Administrator reportedly committed suicide, but knowing her, she was still out in the world somewhere, probably attempting to properly manufacture more Australium for herself. For Blu and Red, the war was over, and they couldn't care less what happens to their old companions. The only thing left for them now was to go out and find new lives.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Parting Ways

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE NOTE: ALMOST NONE OF THIS IS CANON (INCLUDING NAMES). I WILL ALSO NOT BE TYPING OUT HOW THEIR ACCENTS SOUND.

(I'm not going to type how their accents sound. Also it's a fanfiction, so names and all might be different.)

 

Red and Blu, once vicious enemies, are now giving up the fight and returning to their homes. Mann Co no longer sends them new weaponry, and instead focuses on their wealthier clients. Ms. Pauling ditched her name and disappeared. The Administrator reportedly committed suicide, but knowing her, she was still out in the world somewhere, probably attempting to properly manufacture more Australium for herself. For Blu and Red, the war was over, and they couldn't care less what happens to their old companions. The only thing left for them now was to go out and find new lives.

 

"Sasha, sweetheart, we have enough bear for dinner."  
 

"Archie! That isn't the ribcage! Put it back! Remove your gecko from the table!"  
  
"Good aim, Sydney! You're a real pro with a slingshot!"  
 

"Careful, Maria. Your back is arching, the tray will slip."  
  
"Oh heck yeah Paul! Another home run!"

 

" *Muffled yelling followed by squeakier muffled yelling* "  
 

"LIBERTY! I HEARD YOU WERE BEING BULLIED! SHOW ME WHO DID IT SO THAT I CAN PUMMEL THEM!!!"  
  
"Sherry! Can ye get yer old man a bottle of whiskey?"

 

"Nice rabbit trap there, Irene! I don't know what's gonna get caught in a cardboard box though, partner."

 

The old Red team started families amongst themselves. Somehow, the Australium that was scattered around the areas they fought managed to work its way into their systems, and now their hearts pumped it along with their blood. The Australium was transferred to their partners and their children, for reasons obvious. They weren't aware of this factor, and lived their lives very cautiously, as if they could now die permanently.

 

Every day each one had to remind themselves that they weren't "Scout, Soldier, Engineer, Spy" and so on. They went by their actual names, which had almost escaped them completely during their years of war.

 

The Scout's name is Judas. His real last name is even a secret to him kept by the Blu spy and his mother. According to Judas, his last name is Williams. He and his wife Jessica have one boy named Paul who took after his father's love of baseball. Day and night, there he was, standing in the alley, hitting a ball against the wall over and over again. When Judas gets home from his work at the docks, he'll stand out in the yard with Paul and play catch while Jessica cooks dinner or watches them while doing paperwork. They were a tightly knit family, and did mostly everything together.

 

Soldier went on to legally change his name to Jane Doe. He and his wife, Zhanna Doe, moved to New York City because Jane wanted to see the Statue of Liberty every single time he woke up. Zhanna, in love with Jane, agreed to leave the Russian mountains to move in with him. Even after the team disbanded, Jane and the Heavy kept in touch because they were now technically brothers in law. Their daughter, literally born at the foot of the Statue, was named Liberty. The Heavy told Jane that if he ever hurt this child, Jane would be flipped inside out and have his bones used to make a chair. Jane agreed that little lady Liberty would be a wonderful American!  
  
The Heavy, real name Misha Ivanov, went right back to the Russian mountains as soon as he could. While trekking through the snow, he ran into a tough Russian woman named Natascha. She was a well-built woman, and even had a bear to eat with her. Misha decided to lead her back to his family's cabin. She stayed there for a while, until the two of them ultimately decided that they were in love. Together they had a girl and named her Sasha. Misha moved his gun from the small bed next to him, and the baby Sasha spent her infanthood there. Sasha was born premature, and weak. After she was born, Natascha and Misha decided to take Sasha to America and live with Jane and Zhanna until she was strong enough to survive the harsh Russian mountain winters.

 

The medic, Viktor Stein, decided to move into a boat kept on a dock in between Germany and Denmark. He worked with gangs, specifically in the black market departments. One of his victims was unknowingly pregnant. After stealing her organs, the doctor found the unborn child and wanted to see if he could find some way, and quickly, to keep the child alive. If he succeeded, it would be a medical miracle! An incredibly premature child kept alive without the nurturing of its mother? Absolutely unheard of. Viktor managed to keep the baby alive. He named him after his long gone companion Archimedes, and nicknamed him Archie for short. After a feud with a certain gang, Viktor and Archie were forced to flee from the German coast. Having nowhere else to go, Viktor brought them to America where they continued to live in their boat off the coast. Viktor didn't want a repeat of their last ordeal, but he needed a way to make money. He finally convinced himself to renew his medical license, and pay the fines he owed. After a few years, he became a successful doctor in his field. He and Archie have been living very well since.

 

Philippe Lefebvre, commonly known as the Spy, faked his own death and returned to Paris where he had an affair with a woman named Farouche. The woman disappeared, and returned months later to announce to Philippe that she was pregnant. Philippe agreed to take care of the child she would have, as she had run into hard times and could not support a child. When the baby turned three, she was passed on to Philippe. He raised her to be a well-mannered  girl with good posture. He chose the name Maria for her, but often called her Fleur. They currently live in their secret apartment in France, with the most beautiful view of the Eifel Tower.

 

Perhaps the most interesting of stories comes from Mr. Mundy, the sniper. He married a very mysterious but kind woman, who worked for Aperture Science. They met while Mundy was out watching the stars in an old field. The woman came up to him and asked, "Aren't the stars beautiful?" From there they struck up a conversation. Mundy explained his previous job to her, and she said she knew of the Red and Blus. She told Mundy about how apparently the entire Blu team was wiped out in a freak accident involving Mann Co. and a radioactive batch of Australium. Mundy was surprised at this, and said that the Red team had no idea that everyone else but them was wiped out. They thought that Mann Co. Had continued with its manufacturing. Apparently, Aperture and Mann Co. had worked together on many things. Mundy and the woman grew close, and Mundy proposed. Soon after their proposal, the woman told him that she wanted to get married and have a child as soon as possible. Confused because of her hurry, he agreed. After the baby was born, the woman disappeared. Aperture tried to cover her existence. They refused to tell Mundy anything, but his curiosity and determined attitude beat them. He learned that her mind was transferred into a machine. Mundy, in a state of grief, searched for his wife against their warnings. He didn't want to hear their excuses of, "She's not herself anymore," or "Caroline is gone." He came face to face with the robot, stunned in shock and silence. His Caroline… actually a mindless robot… He had their daughter in his hands, and he was shaking slightly. The robot was staring at him, as if trying to remember something. The turrets were lined up, about to shoot the intruders, but the robot stopped them. "To think I could ever forget the only two people I care about most in the world." From that day on, Mundy and the baby lived in the laboratory with GLaDOS, as the only two humans she could never hate. Family pictures are a little strange to look at, but that's okay.

 

The Pyro continued work in the pyrotechnics field. They never took off their uniform and gas mask, but nobody seems to notice this. The grenades were removed from their belt, and the patch was taken off, but it was the same old Red uniform. The pyro had a child and named them *hudda hodda* which roughly translates to Jesse. Jesse wears a paper bag over their head, and baggy clothes. Not much else is known about their home life and who the pyro courted with, but the pyro is never seen with anyone else but the child. There is a large chance that the pyro is an alien and doesn't have any real name. Any data that did exist about the pyro was burned… by the pyro.

 

Dell Conagher, still working in the engineering field, landed a job on a farm. The widow there couldn't keep working everything on her own, and hired the engineer to fix up old tractors and make automated machines that could do some of the work for her. She also wanted him to design a source of security. He subconsciously built another sentry gun, but replaced the bullets with tranquilizer darts. After the gun fires at whomever get close to the fields, the machine will alert the police. The widow asked Dell where he got the design and how he knew what to do. Dell gave in, and told her of his previous job on the Red team. He expected her to fire him, not wanted to deal with his war stories and possible active enemies. She instead was very interested, asking him to teach her how to build things like him. Dell taught the widow everything he knew, and before long, she was as good as he was. He and the widow ultimately fell in love, and together had two daughters. Their first daughter, Lily, died at the age of three due to heart failure. They fell into despair, but both of them desperately wanted to raise a child. They had another little girl, that Dell decided to name Irene. Irene was born healthy, and grew up as a strong, optimistic child. She had a big interest in mechanics, much to the approval of Dell and his wife. Delilah, Dell, and Irene Conagher live happily together on a farm, surrounded by their passion. Guns, guns, and more guns.

 

The most boring story would have to be Tavish Finnegan GeGroot's. He moved back with his grandmother. They lived in the bad part of a tiny town in the middle of Idaho. He never actually met a woman and fell in love like the others. Tavish instead sat around the house, bored and lazy, all day long. One day, a baby was left on their doorstep. Tavish was going to bring the baby to another house, but his grandmother didn't let him. She told him that raising a baby would teach him how to be more responsible. The note left by simply said, "She doesn't have a name. Please take care of her." Tavish didn't take it seriously, and named her Sherry. His grandmother didn't like it, but Tavish said that he wouldn't raise her unless she was named Sherry. The girl developed an interest in exploding things and Vikings. Tavish decided that she may as well be his biological daughter, and put more seriousness into his raising of her, like teaching her how to safely handle potato bombs.

 

Yes, our heroes led some… interesting lives with their children. How they all ended going up to the same camp is beyond our imaginations.


	2. Liberty Belle Doe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A true Lady Liberty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These next few chapters will be rather short.

Liberty, full name Liberty Belle Doe, had a loud voice and a steadfast mind. She wanted to be just like her father when she grew up, and even wore a bucket on her head constantly to match his helmet. At only eight years of age, she knew every swear in the English language. She, her mother, and her father ate four times the normal serving size of average people. Liberty is rumored among her classmates to have "bones of steel," and "a foghorn for vocal cords" because of her strange way of being unable to get hurt and her extraordinarily loud voice.

 

She had long black hair, tied into two long messy pigtails tied with red and white striped ribbons. She also had blue, star-shaped hair clips that she kept her bangs back with. Her skin wasn't very tan, but she wasn't pale white either. Freckles dotted her face, and he had bright blue eyes.

  
Liberty's father was her hero. She wore a red shirt, which she drew all over with marker to match his uniform. Same symbol on the shoulder, and same grenade belt (only, one of them was made of marker). He was a true American, just like she wanted to be.

 

Liberty had a fascination with the American history and the outdoors. She and her father Jane spent hours outside playing paintball, soccer, dodgeball, football, and when it got cold enough, hockey. They were active, sporty, healthy, and strong.

 

They ate bears and deer for dinner, and occasionally shark. They didn't see anything wrong with this, of course, knowing them. They caught their own shark in the ocean with their bare hands, and imported large amounts of bear from Misha in the Russian mountains.

 

Zhanna and Jane decided that Liberty needed a good few weeks away from the crowded city, and searched for summer camps. It would be great for their little girl to get out into the real wild, and meet other kids her age! The ones here didn't favor Liberty's personality and beliefs that much.

 

On the fourteenth of June, Liberty packed her bags and embarked on her adventure.


	3. Paul Isaac Williams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Batter up!

Paul Isaac Williams, son of Judas Williams, was nothing short of a troublemaker. He developed his father's same love for baseball, and was constantly breaking vases and picture frames in the house by hitting baseballs against them. Judas and Jessica didn't mind too much, since they've been in MUCH worse situations. Besides, anything they have in their Massachusetts isn't all that unique or expensive (other than the Australium coated weaponry hidden under closet floorboards in case of emergencies). They lived simply, not expecting too much to come for them now. Judas landed a job at the docks fishing, and working as an assistant to any fishermen in need of it. It wasn't the happiest job, or nicest smelling by far, but it paid well. He was happy to work there if it meant that he still had time to play for their local baseball team. After a few years of playing, he even got his own baseball card.

 

Paul wore this proudly, and constantly told his baseball friends all about how his dad was the famous Judas Williams baseball player. They all acted calm about it, but really were jealous. Judas Williams can knock them all out of the ballpark.

 

His appearance is nothing surprising. Paul constantly wears his baseball uniform, and an old baseball cap he found in the attic. He is number one on the field, literally, and it's the number printed on the back of his shirt. He has teal eyes, and dark brown hair.

 

Paul had been having trouble making friends lately, and his parents needed a break from all the bashing and crashing in the house.  
  
On the fourteenth of June, the ten year old Paul packed his bags and set out to win a new game.


	4. Sydney Caroline Mundy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The cake is a lie.

Over in the Mundy household… er… laboratory, things never got boring. There's always a turret funeral to attend. There's always someone to sing with. There's always someone there to discuss theories with. There's always someone to vent to, to laugh with, to experiment with, to play games with, to do anything with. Sydney enjoyed her life in the old laboratory. Even with all the robots around though… she still felt lonely. The cores were actually sentient and she still felt lonely. Sydney didn't know what life outside of the lab was like. Her mother and father told her it was too dangerous for a little girl. Sydney argued that the lab was full of neurotoxin and deadly pools of death-water. Her father and mother proceeded to cover every pool of death-water in the entire facility.   
  
Sydney often sat by herself up on a loose peace of scaffolding surrounded by massive amounts of jungle vines and trees. She felt at home, sitting high up in the branches. Sydney would bring her slingshot with her and shoot at random targets, including her mother, her father, some of the cores, passing turrets, and even animals that found their way down.

 

Sydney has short, dark brown, messy hair, and tan skin from sitting where the sun is visible all day long. She has ocean blue eyes, and wears a faded black akubra hat. She usually wears a white tank top, khaki capris, and leather boots. She is also known to keep a small bag over her shoulders to store her slingshot as well as a bunch of painted rocks or dried balls of mud.  After 6 years of practicing with the slingshot, the nine year old Sheila had a deadly aim.

 

One afternoon, she desperately wanted to go outside. So desperately in fact that she was debating sneaking out. While she was thinking, a woman with a tank top like hers and a pulled down orange jumpsuit walked into the room where Sydney usually likes to sit down and think. The woman looked at Sydney with a mix of surprise and confusion.

 

"A little kid… But I thought I was the only one here…"  
  
"You can talk?!"  
  
Sydney looked just above her to see a personality core riding the rails. Sydney smiled and waved to him.  
  
"Afternoon, Wheatley!"

 

The woman had… a portal gun? Why did she have that? Not even Sydney was allowed to have one of those! She looked between Wheatley and I, frowning.  
  
"You two know each other?! And yes I can talk, I just didn't bother to before. But someone please explain what's going on!"  
  
Wheatley spins around on his rails.  
  
"That little missy there is the troublemaking daughter of GLaDOS and her husband. She was born before Caroline was made into GLaDOS."  
  
"Sydney! What are you doing near that wretched creature?!"  
  
Speak of the devil.

 

Sydney is suddenly lifted by a robotic platform.  
  
"Stay away from this monster. Her name is Chell, and she is the only living test subject left. Supposedly. She's helping me do science. She is ALSO the one who killed me, your loving mother. She did bring me back though, on accident. I like to think that she truly cares for science."

 

"You have a daughter?! Who on Earth would EVER have a child with YOU?!"  
  
GLaDOS sighs. "You truly know nothing about love. My husband and I married before I became the world's greatest experiment. He is loyal to me, and has stayed be my side these many years. He and my child even agreed to be cryogenically frozen every once in a while to make sure that we stay with each other for as long as possible. Of course, I wouldn't expect you to understand that."  
  
Chell growls at her and waves her portal gun around.  
  
"I can't believe this!!!"

 

After that short confrontation with Chell, GLaDOS and Mundy decided that maybe exposure to others would be healthy and good for Sydney.

 

On the fourteenth of June, Sydney packed her bags and set out to run her own experiments.   
 


	5. Archimedes Eva Stein

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That isn't the rib cage.

Archimedes Eva Stein had been dissecting creatures since he was 2 years old.   
  
"Vater! Why am is my middle name a girl's?"  
  
Viktor rolled his eyes at his adopted son and set down the book he was reading.  
  
"Mein sohn, it is the name of your mother."  
  
"What happened to my mother?"  
  
"Why are you asking all these questions, child? You're only ten years old. Much too young."  
  
"Vater! It is my business to know!"  
  
Viktor sighed and rubbed his temples muttering, "Sometimes I wish I didn't raise you to be so smart and cunning like me. Your mother was a beautiful girl, Archimedes. She was very young, not very smart. She had big aspirations. Don't worry mein sohn. I will tell you about your mother one day."

 

Archimedes crossed his arms and lifted his gecko from the table. He shuffled through the large house slowly, examining the walls like he did so often before. It was nice to live in a large, clean house, but it wasn't nice not to have anyone to share it with. Archimedes desperately wanted company, but his father was hardly home. He was always too busy working in the hospital. Archimedes knew he was doing this to give him a good life, but he wished he had a better connection with someone, with ANYONE. His father was more of a distant relative than a father.  
  
Archie ran up the stairs and pushed the door to his room open. He set his gecko in his cage and rolled over onto his bed, staring at the ceiling. He drummed his hands on the books scattered over his sheets, humming to himself.  
  
"Xenocrates, why is my only friend a gecko?"  
  
The gecko did not respond, and only licked its eyeball.

 

Archie sighed and rolled over to the tank, scratching the

  
"Yeah, that's what I thought… You talk to me more than my vater does and you don't even know what I'm saying. Then again, he doesn't seem to either. I'm glad I have you to… sort of listen, though."  
  
Viktor frowned slightly, listening to what Archie was saying from outside his door. He had no idea that Archimedes felt so alone and unloved…  
  
The next day, he decided to send Archie to summer camp where he might make some friends.   
  
On the fourteenth of June, Archie packed his bags and was sent out to find new patients.


	6. Maria Fleur Lefebvre

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am not who you think I am

Maria Fleur Lefebvre acted more as a princess than someone who had to live in the shadows. Her father asked it of her, and she obediently obliged. She knew not of his past and why he preferred to hide, but she did as she was told. She stood with her back straight, hands folded at her waist. She wore a red high waisted skirt and a white blouse. She wore short black heels and kept her long brown hair in a French braid down her back. She wore thin white gloves and black stockings.

Maria had never been outside her apartment in the daylight for twelve years, and was extremely pale. Her father was just as pale, except fer some parts of his face, which were strangely tanned. He said it tanned long ago before he had to hide, but Maria never questioned further than that. Philippe told her that her mother passed away, and Maria accepted that. She listened well and paid attention to every last detail.One day though, she decided that her life was incredibly boring and that she would like to make some friends. She confronted her father, and he thought for a few days.She can't possibly be public in France, he would inevitably be found then. He searched around, until finally stumbling upon something that may be interesting.

"Mon Fleur, I will send you to America to make friendships. One of my old friends live there. I'm sure he'll be happy to help you get to where you need to go. His name is Judas, and he lives in Massachusetts. All you have to do is tell him that you know me. Don't give my name, but tell him you are Spy's daughter. He may ask about me, but if you care about me you will not respond directly to it. I will pack your bags for you, and you will depart soon."On the fourteenth of June, Maria departed from France to discover a new world. 


	7. Jesse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Huddah huddah huddah.

"Huddah, huddah hudda hud. Hua, huddah hudda huddah. Huddah hua huddah huh hua huddah."

 

A softer voice replied back, "Huddah! Huddah Hua!"

  
The Pyro was shocked to hear this, and asked, "Huddah hua huddah?"  
  
The child turned away, arms crossed. They didn't want to respond. How dare their own parent force them to go to camp school with kids they did not even know? They child was only eight, and refused to travel such a distance away from home.   
  
"Huddah. HUDDAH."  
  
The Pyro gasped and put their hands to their mask. "Huddah…? Huddah hua, huddah. Hua Huddah. HUDDAH."  
  
Jesse stopped and though about what the Pyro said, then nodded slowly.  
  
"Huddah. Hua." He decided to give it a go.  
  
On the fourteenth of June, Jesse slung his bags over his shoulders and trudged on to find new things to burn.

 

  
  
 


	8. Sherry DeGroot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 99 bottles of beer on the wall

Sherry DeGroot was only eleven and already had an alcohol problem. Her father got her started when she was just a baby, and she hasn't stopped since. Her grandmother had tried to call the child protection services, but has been unable to locate the phone every time due to Sherry "accidentally" misplacing it. She honestly did not mind her life, and had a rather positive outlook on things.  
  
Mostly.

 

"Old man you're growing quite the beer gut there."  
  
Sherry's technically adoptive faller belched and scratched his stomach.  
  
"Aye. You might just end up with one yourself if you don't get more active soon."

 

"Eyelander doesn't have to get active, and HE'S still around!"  
  
"He's got a taste for heads, not whiskey. That and he's technically dead, and a sword. Your argument is invalid."  
  
"WILL BOTH OF YOU QUIT YOUR HOWLING AND HELP ME COOK DINNER?!"  
  
"You're in the closet, mum, not the kitchen."  
  
Tavish rolled over and mumbled profanities to himself.  
  
Sherry sighed and laid down on top of him as she changed the channel of the T.V to cartoons. She didn't really care if she was going to grow up with a beer gut. In fact, it made her feel proud. She could ALREADY hold more liquor than some of her father's friends. Sherry was a real trooper, as her father would say.  
  
"Lass you're gonna have to get off of me."  
  
"I have nothing better to do!"  
  
"Go play with your friends or something…"  
  
"I don't have any friends!"

 

"What about… what's her name, Veronica?"  
  
"She's gone at a summer camp in Europe."  
  
"Summer Camp?"  
  
"You know, where some parent sent their kids to do cool outdoor activities and stuff?"  
  
"...How long does this summer camp last?"  
  
"Some last all summer, some last a few weeks, some even shorter."  
  
"PACK YOUR BAGS SHERRY, YOU'RE GOING TO SUMMER CAMP."  
  
On the fourteenth of June, Sherry loaded up her luggage and set out on her journey to escape her house for a little while.


	9. Sasha Bear Ivanov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bear paws roasting on an open fire

Sasha Bear Ivanov. Short corn yellow hair and blue eyes. She doesn't talk much and gets straight to the point. She has one cousin named Liberty who lives in the Americas. Her father Misha loves her very much and even placed her in the bed that used to belong to his gun of the same name. Sasha was proud.  
  
She was sent to live in the Americas until she was strong enough to move back to the mountains with her parents. She told them every day that she was big enough, but they told her each time that she was not. Sasha did not question further.

 

Liberty wanted to go to summer camp, so Sasha followed. Her cousin was like her sister, even though they were born on different continents and had different parents. The nine year old did not consider herself to be smart, but she obviously wasn't an idiot. She had intellect in other subjects not normally thought about first.  
  
Sasha packed her bags along with her cousin on the fourteenth of June, ready to find more bears.


	10. Irene Widow Conagher

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Goodnight Irene

"Irene, you're nine years old now, and I think it's time you put down the gadgets and go make some friends."  
  
Irene stuck her tongue out at her father and dropped her wrench to her desk.  
  
"But I'm not done with my robot cat!"  
  
Dell laughed quietly, sitting down on her bed and leaning on her desk.  
  
"You work on it every day girlie, you need to go outside and get some fresh air! I know how you feel, wanting to hole up inside with your gadgets, but you gotta get outside sometimes and meet new people."  
  
"But daaaad.… I want to finish my robot cat…"

 

Dell propped himself up on his elbows and rolled his eyes.  
  
"You're still missing a piece though, aren't you? Maybe you'll find it out there somewhere? At my old job, I found all kinds of parts just laying around. Maybe you'll do the same? What do you say Irene, wanna give it a go?"  
  
Irene shrugged and mumbled something about figuring it out later. Dell nodded slowly and stood up, exiting the room. He draped an arm around his wife Delilah on the couch and explained how Irene would think about it. He also told his wife that she should pack a bag for Irene as she'd likely agree to go at the very last minute.   
  
Later on at dinner, Irene dropped her toolbox gently on the table.  
  
"Dad, I want to work on the sentries."

 

This was Irene's way of telling her parents that she was ready for more complicated work. The two Texan parents look at each other with proud smiles on their faces. Dell nodded and said,  
  
"Right after dinner."

 

An hour later, Irene was marveling at the beauty of her family's home defense system. She ran her hands along the cold metal, listening carefully to the melodic beeping traveling from sentry to sentry. She pulled off the ammunition chain and gasped with delight upon seeing the homemade tranquilizer darts. She brushed her hand along the cold metal, giggling.  
  
"How did you make this, dad…?"  
  
Dell sat down on the ground next to her and tapped the sentry gun lightly with his wrench.  
  
"My old work. I designed this little number for a completely different use. Now we use them to protect the farm and our family."  
  
He paused and then asked,   
  
"Did I tell you the story of what happened when you were just a newborn?"  
  
Irene frowns. "No?"  
  
"Well, it all started when you were barely six months old. Two bandits had been trying to get around our guns for quite a while. They threw dead animals at our guns to see if they'd be distracted by them. Now this is when the guns weren't as good as they were now. They'd use those animals to distract our sentries. What they didn't realize is that our guns have video feed. I saw what they were doing, and spent the LONGEST time trying to upgrade the machines to not shoot passing animals. But I never got it to work on the big sentries in time. These varmints were ruthless, and wanted to steal all of our cornstalks. Late at night, they travelled into our yard carrying dead animal carcasses. They tossed them at our first two sentries, and snuck their way in. I heard the sentries go off, and woke up in the middle of the night. I looked out my window to see those two shadowy snakes slipping through our yard. I took my toolbox and hurried downstairs as fast as I could. While they were sneaking up, I set up a tiny little mini sentry. This one I had been working on for a while, and had its sensors all tricked out. These crooks made it to the porch, pulling out their guns, getting ready to bust in… when they heard that mini sentry beep. I saw the color drain from their faces! But if it weren't for that mini sentry, we might not be standing here today."  
  
Irene tilted her head in confusion.  
  
"Why tell me now…?"  
  
"Well Irene, that mini sentry wouldn't have been built without you. I know that sounds crazy, but hear me out. The new big sentries we have here are designed after your mother and I. I built two designs, one that's bigger and holds more ammo, and one that's smaller and moves faster than the other. When your sister, Lily, passed away… we were all heartbroken. Call my crazy, but I blamed myself for not building her a sentry. I never wanted to build anything again because I was so… depressed. But then Irene told me that she was pregnant again, and I immediately rebuilt one of my old designs, but better, just for you."  
  
Irene looked at the sentry, unsure how to feel. She breathed in the warm air outside and watched the sunset as her hair blew in the wind.  
  
"Dad, what was your old job? Why did you need to make those sentry guns anyways?"  
  
Dell pushed his hat up and wiped his forehead, staring at the sentry.

 

"My old job… I am not proud of. I was sworn into secrecy not to tell a soul, but they've all passed away… The documents swearing my secrecy are destroyed. Irene, my old job wasn't a good job. I worked on a battlefield, for reasons that I wasn't even allowed to know. In the end we found out that we were fighting for Australium covered land, but I won't get into that. I built sentries, dispensers, and teleporters for my old teammates to help them in battle. I was a defender."  
  
Irene's eyes widen.   
  
"Your old teammates? Who were they…?"  
  
"Oh them.…I don't remember much. It was all pretty crazy. Most of them are still around though, somewhere…"  
  
Dell looks over at the sunset and wipes a tear from his face. He stands up, ruffling his daughter's hair.  
  
"Goodnight Irene."  
  
He walks towards the house, hands over his face. He didn't want his daughter to see him cry.  
  
Irene decided that she wanted to be like her father, the master engineer. For that, she'd need teammates. She'd need friends.   
  
On the fourteenth of June, Irene grabbed her toolbox and started her search for a team.  
  
 


	11. My Roommate is a Psychopath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Geckos are useless against Russians

"GOOD MORNING CAMPERS!"  
  
Archimedes scowled, already hating everyone here. The boy he had to walk in with was loud and full of himself. Archie tried to tell him how much he didn't care about his dinosaur collection, but the kid didn't want to hear any of it. The camp counselors were all too happy and the other kids were booger-picking idiots with bright clothes that don't match and light up sneakers.

 

Archie dragged his bags and his gecko to his assigned cabin, and frowned when he opened the door.  
  
Two beds, two wardrobes, and a ratty old carpet on the floor. Classy.

 

He pulled his bags to the bed and kicked them under. He threw himself onto the bed and winced at the squeaking it made. He pulled out a book on human dissection and continued reading, as Xenocrates climbed onto his head to nap. Minutes later, a girl with long black pigtails walked in with her bags. She took one look at Archimedes and the book he was reading. She dropped her stuff and screamed,  
  
"SASHA!!! MY ROOMMATE IS A PSYCHOPATH WHO WANTS TO EAT ME!!!"  
  
Archimedes looked over at the girl and sighed. It's the hair and the eyes, isn't it? Or is it just the book? Having weird features because of your extraordinarily early birth can make you look a little weird. Before Archie could say anything to protest what she said, a big girl had hoisted him out of bed and into the air and held him up by his shirt.  
  
"You are trying to hurt cousin?"  
  
Archimedes screeched and swung his legs around.  
  
"No!!! I haven't touched your cousin!!! I haven't even moved from my bed!!!"  
  
The pigtailed girl grinned and shouted,  
  
"THIS IS TRUE!!"  
  
Sasha rolled her eyes and dropped Archie to the floor.  
  
"Apologies."  
  
She gave the pigtailed girl looked at Archie and saluted.

  
"MY NAME IS LIBERTY, AND I AM AN AMERICAN LIKE MY DAD!!!"  
  
Archie sighed facepalmed and sighed, dreading the weeks to come. Maybe he could get a new roommate…  
  
~~~  
  
In a cabin not too far away, two girls were having a simple conversation.   
  
"So um.. Where are you from?"  
  
"No idea."  
  
"Oh.…that's nice… I'm from Texas…"

  
"Lovely."  
  
Irene wasn't too sure if she liked her new roommate or not. She had something that sounded like a mix between an American and an Australian accent. She wasn't mean or anything… she just didn't seem friendly at all…   
  
"Well uh.…what's your name?"  
  
"Sydney."  
  
"Oh.…Um… I'm Irene, Irene Conagher.."

 

"It's a pleasure."  
  
Irene sighed and stared out her window. This was going to be a long summer…"

 

~~~  
  
"So.…you're my aunt?"  
  
"Precisely."  
  
"You're my dad's sister?"  
  
"Oui."  
  
Paul scratched his head. So he's now roommates with his aunt Maria. Alright, at least it's someone he kind of knows, and not that weird looking German kid… He's pretty sure that he'd try to surgically insert a monkey heart into him. That doesn't sound very fun.

 

"….How does that work?"  
  
"My father got with your grandmother after her husband died. The two of them married. My father moved back to France and had an affair. Your grandmother died and never found out. My father is the legal guardian of your father, which makes us step siblings. You are his child and that makes me your aunt."

 

"Woah. Woah. Wait. He had an affair?"  
  
Maria rolled her eyes.  
  
"Yes, he had an affair. It was dishonest of him but it happened and it is now in the past, and we should not worry about it."  
  
*About two days earlier*

 

"Good evening Judas. I am the spy's daughter. You must bring me to summer camp."  
  
"You'reHisWhatNow?"

 

~~~

 

"Huddah… hua hudda??"  
  
"Aye me paper bag headed friend! Aye!"  
  
Sherry tossed a bottle of rum to a very confused Jesse. He had only asked her name.

 

~~~

 

Sasha smiled at her empty cabin.

 

 

"Yes. Without roommate I can fit many bears."


	12. Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's poison in the ink

Irene found herself to be more secluded  around all the other campers. None of them seemed to share her interest of tinkering with things and building contraptions. Archimedes decided he was in the same situation. When he tried to tell the other children about all the deadly diseases they could get by drinking the river water, they laughed and ignored him. Archie, who doesn't do well with rejection, dumped the carcass of a deer at the mouth of the river. The children would end up consuming it later on. Paul and Maria stayed by themselves in the corners of each rooms, chatting about whatever crossed their mind.  
  
Sydney, however, was more than happy to say hello to all the campers. She'd never really seen another human other than her dad and Chell her whole life, so this was really fun! She didn't understand them very well because of all their weird modern slang, but she did her best.

 

Everyone, no matter WHO they were, stared at Archie whenever he was around. He just looked so weird… and out of place… White hair, purple-pink eyes… IT'S AS IF HIS BODY DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO DEVELOP ALL THE WAY. Nobody had the bravery to approach him, and he appreciated that. It might also be because of the worn out medical bag he wore over his shoulder and kept his stuff in. Since his father was a doctor, Archimedes was gifted some of his old equipment such as the bag with the large red cross on it.

 

Sherry had been escorted away from other campers many times after "attempting to decapitate them with sharpened sticks." She and Jesse had become as close as siblings in a strange way; they both like destroying things. Jesse had nearly burned down the forest twice, and Sherry drank twice her weight in alcohol.

 

Sasha had been fined almost five thousand dollars for her bear kills.

 

The camp counselors often herded all of the other campers up and brought them to the other side of the camp while the nine… problem children… did their own thing. Today, they finally realized that they were always the only campers doing absolutely nothing while the rest of the children were off playing games and exploring with the counselors.

 

Archie sat on the step of his and Liberty's cabin. The two of them… well, they haven't killed each other yet. Liberty has started calling him Schatz, after Archie mentioned that it means sweetheart.   
  
"SCHATZ!!! WHAT IS THAT BOOK THAT YOU ARE READING THERE?!"  
  
Archie rolls his eyes. "It's a medical book."  
  
"WHY IS IT WRITTEN IN ALIEN?!"  
  
"It's written in German."  
  
"OF COURSE A NAZI LIKE YOU WOULD BE READING ALIEN LANGUAGES!!"  
  
"I'm not a Nazi, liberty. There are no Nazis left. I don't even live in Germany anymore."  
  
"WHATEVER YOU SAY BRATWURST!"

 

Archie closes his book and rolls his eyes. The camp is mailing letters to home today. Might as well write one, not that his dad was going to bother reading it.  
  
'Vater, the children here are strange. They don't seem to have any shame, and constantly pester me. Eight of the other campers are… especially strange. One of them likes to wear an eyepatch, and I have no idea if she actually needs it or not. Another boy wears a paper bag over his head all the time, and truth be told, I don't know if he is actually a HE? This one girl called Sasha has at least three dead bears in her closet…. She scares me…. She seems to be cousins with this girl named Liberty, who really gets on my last nerve. She insists on calling me schatz, never stops yelling, and is apparently convinced that I am a Nazi… Two other girls aren't actually that bad, they like to tinker around…"  
  
Archimedes stopped writing, scribbled everything out, and crumpled up the letter. It sounds too weird… and it’s too long. His vater would never take the time to read that. Archie pulled up a new sheet of paper.  
 

'Summer camp is fun. The children ignore me and turn away when I walk in. I can't make any friends, but I am enjoying myself in the forest.

 

Sincerely, Archimedes.'  
  
Yeah, that'd probably work a lot better.

 

Liberty's letter had a similar length, but a VERY different message.  
  
'SOLDIER DAD, I AM MAKING THE KIDS HERE FANTASTIC AMERICAN CITIZENS.   
  
HODDAH!'  
 

Later that night, the counselors stared at the nine letters from their interesting group of campers.  
  
"This one says, 'Hey pops, I've clocked at least ten birds with my ball. They’ll need a sanctuary by the time I'm done.'"  
  
The orange haired counselor held up one soaked in gasoline.  
  
"This one is drenched and just has the word 'Huddah' written all over it."

  
Another counselor slid one across the table.  
  
'Old man I'm running out of rum. Please send more.'  
 

"Oh, this one is from that bear-killer… 'I have many bears for dinner.' That's ALL it says.."

 

"How about this one? 'Tell the sentry guns that I'm bringing them some fancy new parts.' Or this one, 'Make sure mom doesn't go crazy and kill you with her neurotoxin while I'm gone.' Or even, 'Mon Pére, I have found my nephew and brother in law. They are henceforth immune from my poisons.' Should we be concerned about this, or alert the authorities…?"  
  
The main counselor shook his head slowly.   
  
"Nah, they're just kids, they don't know any better. Just wait, we'll have a nice game of capture the flag tomorrow and everything will be fine!"  
  
 


	13. Capture the Intelligence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Propulsion Gel and Gidget Gadgets

"THIS DIDN'T GO WELL AT ALL."

 

Some hours ago, the campers all split into multiple teams of nine. By the sheer accident from the draw of a hat, the nine infamous campers were somehow placed together. The counselors were concerned at first, but decided to give it a try and let them roll with that.  
  
"Alright campers! We're going to play capture the flag! Your team will be given a specific color flag, and that will be your team name. You can come up with a longer name, but it must fit within three letters of your color name. Say if you're on team Yellow, you'd be YLO, and you might do… Young Little Olives? Yippy Lake Opals? Really anything you want! You will take your flag and you will hide it somewhere in the forest area that is our camp. You may not hide it underground, and a little part of it MUST be showing. You can come up with any types of defense to keep your flag safe, but please, don't make it too dangerous. We don't want anyone getting hurt! We're going to pass out the posters, makers, and flags now. Draw your banner, write your names, and think of a team name!"  
  
The Orange Team, ONG, made their long name "Only Nothing Goes." They were primarily 13 and 14 year olds, so of course they're going to be tough to beat. Their banner was a big orange sun with the middle empty, a diamond inside of it. The Yellow Team, YLO, was made up of mostly twelve year olds. They're long name was "Young Lives Only." Another only, huh? Their banner was a yellow ribbon, with the names of all the team members written in it. The Green teem, GRN, had a long name of Glittery Rainbow Narwhals. They were mostly eleven and twelve years old. Their banner was a horribly drawn narwhal covered in little asterisk marks, presumably the glitter. The Blue Team, BLU, decided that their long name was "Baby Little Unicorn." They were around their nines and tens, some of them eight. Their banner was a decently drawn unicorn pony. The Purple Team, PPL, went with "Pretty Plastic Llamas." They ranged in all ages. Their banner had a stick figure llama on it wearing a top hat. Finally, there was the Red team, RED. The Relatable Examination Demolitionists. Their banner was an eagle with a stick of dynamite in its mouth. The eagle had a wrench in its claws and fire in its eyes. The counselors were both concerned and very impressed with their name and drawing.  
  
"Well that.…settles it, I suppose… Now comes the fun part! You all get to assign team roles! You can have… a captain, a defender, anything you want really!"  
  
"ALRIGHT SISSIES! I WILL ASSIGN TEAM ROLES! I AM THE PRIVATE! YOU! NAZI! YOU'RE THE NURSE! SASHA, YOU'RE GONNA BE THE HEFTY. T-BALL, YOU'RE GONNA BE THE RUNNER. KANGAROO, YOU'RE THE SHARPSHOT. BAGUETTE, YOU'RE OUR DOUBLE AGENT. KEROSENE, YOU'RE OUR FIREBUG. DRUNKARD, YOU'RE OUR BUNKER BUSTER. TINKERBELL, YOU'RE OUR TECHIE. ANY QUESTIONS? TOO BAD."  
  
The others surprisingly didn't have any arguments against what Liberty assigned them. It seemed as if she really did try to assign things to everyone that fit their interests. War, Medicine, Human shielding, Running, Sniping, Double crossing, Fire, Explosions, and Engineering.

 

"Okay campers, time's up! Let's see what you came up with!"  
  
The other children gave a variety of different roles, such as; Captains, Commanders, Princesses, Kings, Queens, Knights, Guards, Servants, so on and so on. The RED team was looked at strangely when they gave theirs. The counselors were silently debating if putting them all on the same team was a good idea… Spoiler alert, it really wasn't.

 

"Now! Go hide your flags!"

 

Paul immediately snatches the flag and bolts off into the forest, waving for his team to follow. Archie threw a long, velcro bandage and it snagged his shirt, allowing Archie to run at almost his same speed to keep up with him and stay with him. "Runner, please slow down!"  
  
"No can do nurse! This flag's going to totally disappear!"

 

"That's against the rules! Schweinhund! The rest of the team can't keep up!"  
  
"Then how are you doin' it, Nursey?"  
  
"I have no idea! Slow down!!"  
  
Runner suddenly stops and smiles innocently, stepping out of the way as Archie falls forward, unable to halt in time.   
  
The other teammates run up and stop behind him, staring down at their fallen nurse.  
  
"NAZI DOWN. 1/9 OF OUR TEAM LOST. WE WILL BE STRONG."  
  
"You DUMMKOPFS I'm NOT DEAD I FELL there is a DIFFERENCE."

 

The Runner puts his foot on the Nurse's back and grins.  
  
"Nah, you're dead."  
  
"DO YOU WANT TO HIDE THE FLAG OR NOT?!"  
  
"Right! The flag!"  
  
The Runner rolls the flag between his fingers and takes off again. The Hefty walks forward and lifts the Nurse off the ground and to his feet.   
  
"The Nurse is okay?"  
  
"Erm.…Ja. I'm good…"

  
"Very well. We continue."  
  
The rest of the team desperately tried to keep up with the Runner, and just barely managed to. The Runner jumped onto the Hefty's back, grabbed a tree branch, and vaulted up into the leaves.   
  
"Red's a bright color, so we gotta hide it good."  
  
The Runner ascended the tree, still explaining his plans.  
  
"I'll just pop it on a branch up here no problem. Private, you want to assign more roles?"  
  
The Private saluted and shouted,  
  
"ALRIGHT SISSIES HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO. RUNNER, FIREBUG AND I WILL BE OFFENCE. BUNKER BUSTER, HEFTY, AND TECHIE WILL BE OUR DEFFENCE SYSTEM. NURSE, SHARPSHOT, AND DOUBLE AGENT, YOU'RE OUR SUPPORT. EVERYONE GOT THAT?"  
  
The whole team grinned and saluted her. "Yes sir!"  
  
"CORRECT! I AM NOW SIR! ON MY MARK, WUSSIES!"  
  
Offence and Support (with the exception of the Sharpshooter) rushed off into the woods in search of the other teams' flags. Left behind was the Bunker Buster, the Hefty, the Techie, and the Sharpshooter.  
  
"So uh.…what do y'all think we should do?"

  
The Techie sits down on a nearby rock and stares up at their flag in the tree.  
 

Sharpshot used the Runner's method of pulling herself into the tree and shrugged.  
  
"I'm just going to hide out up here with my slingshot and shoot anyone that comes by. You can set up a little fancy trap if you want. I think Buster's making potato bombs over there as well."  
  
The Techie rolled her eyes. "Of course she is… well, I guess I'll do just that then."

 

~~~  
  
"I still don't understand how ONE TEAM managed to not only get ALL of the flags in record time, but they SOMEHOW build explosives and traps in the forest?!"  
  
"We're telling you the truth sir…"  
  
"All of the other campers are injured because of those nine kids?! I can't say I believe any of you! Some of those kids looked like they were still eight years old!"  
 

"We're really not lying, sir… They're… they're not normal children… One of them has already downed our bear population by about five… And one girl has already filled her cabin with this weird gel! Every time we walk in to see what it is, we get thrown across the floor and fly out the window!"  
  
".…Sure."  
  
"WE'RE SERIOUS!!! Please call their parents and send them home as soon as possible!"  
  
"I can’t just send the kids back to their parents!"  
  
"WHY NOT? DO YOU WANT US ALL TO DIE? Valerie already went home with a concussion, and Dennison broke his leg!"  
 

"Accidents happen."  
  
"Those CHILDREN did it on PURPOSE!"

 

"Please, they're only a few years older than toddlers. They couldn't have possibly purposefully hurt anyone."  
  
~~~  
  
The Private giggled madly, all six flags in her hands.  
  
"GOOD WORK PRINCESSES! YOUR PRIVATE IS PROUD!"  
  
Archimedes sat against the cabin wall, breathing heavily.  
  
"Yeah.…sure… you weren't the one running around wiping blood from your teammates faces and bandaging them up as we ambushed other team's bases. You know, we probably didn't need to be so violent. They didn't have any real defenses, and only started throwing rocks when we did… Plus the fourteen year olds have it out for us now… I think we better be careful…"

 

"CAREFUL! US?! NEVER! WE ARE NOT A CAREFUL TEAM! WHO ARE WE?!"  
  
"The Relatable Examination Demolitionists!"  
  
"AND WHAT DO WE DO?!"  
  
"Relate, Exanimate, and Decimate!"

 

"WE DO NOT ALLOW THE STINKY OLD TEENAGERS TO BOTHER US!! WE TAKE THEIR THREATS, WE LAUGH, AND WE KICK THEIR BUTTS!!!"  
  
"HOORAH!"

  
 


	14. Short Hiatus Because...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHAT

_**My classmates and I just took a lovely, week long trip to Washington D.C.** _   
  
_**While we were gone, our laptops were turned in, and updated.** _   
  
  
  
_**They deleted all of my writing because they thought it wasn't important. So, while I try to either find a way to pull it back from the abyss or rewrite everything, this process will take a while. Thank you for being understanding!** _

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE NOTE: ALMOST NONE OF THIS IS CANON (INCLUDING NAMES). I WILL ALSO NOT BE TYPING OUT HOW THEIR ACCENTS SOUND.


End file.
